Plan B: Honesty

I never wished to hide from you

Honesty is an act of beauty

if you were to hesitate going through its circumstances

I doubt that you could stand among more misfits to be encountered


Here is my honesty to you -

If it doesn't serve as a purpose

it is hence seen as unnecessary

we've agreed on that, the other night

I have been squandering too much on you

too much that it has to be voided

and avoided

your actions told me that was true

for that was my only source of cue


There are just so much to treasure among the others

and I do value the transparency I share with each individuals

if what we have defeat its purpose - be it the means, or end

there is no point my dear

no point to keep this going


I like you

and I wish to take this further

I am not hasty, I believe so

it is just my pace that is different than yours

plus the many other external factors

that we somehow couldn't intercept

or should I say at least we tried


I do not know if it is supposed to be tough

when to let go

or when to wait

you are like a wind

mysterious and uncertain

no patterns to be observed

unless one chooses to play it safe with you

without any desire to change the status quo - even the slightest of that



I like you

even when I'm trying to hide it away

to not acknowledge it

eventually I found out

it had to be released



But now

I'll have to keep it aside

in the closet for now

no one knows what will happen to it

I just figured that it couldn't be released at this point

it causes damage

I presume



So fly

love

like how I used to put it

fly and never come back

don't even try to attempt


Don't ever come back

Dear Someone

My tenderness is reserved like always, my dear.

So much as I'd want to love you,

you're telling me otherwise

maybe it is for my utmost selfish reasons

that I couldn't stop myself from doing this


I did not anticipate a storm

I hope this is not one

I shall not repeat mistakes,

my dear I shall not.


I want to say 'bear with me'

No, you have no reason to do that

You're not supposed to be a friend too close

Remember?

Because I'm not the one that you'd find yourself falling for

Internalization

When I close my eyes

and tried to make sense of your actions

I walked in your shoes

took a stroll at the park

in a classroom

in various spacial containers

see people that you meet

talked to them

see through the window frame of yours


and switched myself to a mode of default

the identifiable one


caused by its high frequency

I often travel to this made-up realm of mine

not guaranteed a fake among the produced mass

least, played as a role of a tranquilizer

I found myself wanting to become you

to fill in your existence

that is absent in my enclosed wonderland


Fly my dear

fly high

never come back again

I'd assume you'd never

Meta-

Suddenly it seems

anything from the universe could be fed on

I have no fantasies built from objects, subjects, anyway you put it

But at this moment, it all seem to have established

Of what I took for granted

of the patterns I have control over

I could engage with them instantly

As if part of me is equally shared with my vicinity



I need not love to survive

you can leave me, either way

high speed, casual,

with a limp on your right leg,

with an empty sight on your pair of eyes

I took myself as a role of being gargantuan,

I shall stomach every single black particle - found between molecules

My dear,

I think I carry a lot of weight

more than you could imagine

I see fear in every pair of eyes I once adored

No - I do not feel pain, nor do I feel afraid about it

I am an irregular

I would have to take it in that way



If you have what it takes

do tell me off that it is not true

but I doubt that you are a man as such

Least is,

I know you well enough



I hope the mere exploration

fulfilled my role as your subject of love

regardless of it being an experimentation of failure

I played my role

and I did enjoy having you around

crafting our existence upon zero



Now

let me just try to erase what was supposed to be progressed among this programmed chaos

we shall return to blank

we shall return to be static

before everything gets to race towards its finishing line

Waves of Warmth

If I were ever to leave tomorrow

would what you do

There would be endless regrets

time has nothing to wait but

it is our image of self that wins the game

so much to talk of our ego

Baby

I am as buoyant as a ball

when I love you

I (will) tell you

and would never want to leave anything behind

If it is of existentialism 

I am designed to fulfil one of that I own

If you disagree

some things are just meant to be

Love,

Lynn

Pent House

Hopelessly romantic:

I remember standing among the crowd

and a not so pretty - tea time setting

They had poultry, soup dishes and dessert


We had to part

I couldn't overcome what was overflowing

neither could you


As a safeguard measure

we hugged

and that's it


Ironically

That was the moment of truth for me

If you felt much lesser

It was just meant to be