angels

My angels got geared up to battle

events that happened after a pair of snips

I've got tested for love and kindness

love and kindness

love and kindness

as I teared after a long, hard hurtful bash

thinking what could have been different

wishing that I have a bigger heart to absorb

but I'm just a mere soul, like another

and then I recalled how blessed I actually am

bestowed with by love of every form

having friends guiding me through hurdles, even in a larger sphere 

I receive generous shoulders for support

how could I've been shortsighted, even at the slightest 

until the engine runs dry

strangers chose to help, they have no where to rush

my heart, ready to receive kindness

I lived the moment, every bit of it

as I witness,

all of the angels before my eyes

breakfast instead

I awake to fragments of consciousness

'can the self be trusted'

my head kept turning to check if the sky had turned bright

if dusk was coming

as if light will discount my longing to be freed

you were right beside 

sleeping soundly, right beside

for nights, I have been wondering about this

ritual that we build up to

sleeping soundly, right beside

I crawled, and started to express

my affection, through what I understood as being meaningful

I wanted you to experience pleasure

I liked it when you tell me about it

until I realised

my intent couldn't be reciprocated

I lay, quiet in pain

then you countered for a rewrite

'I make you breakfast instead'

I wish to be loved

I wish to be loved

I wish to be loved

got milk

"I didn't get milk today, we don't have much left"

"....oh,"

"what are we going to have for breakfast?"

"we can still go for........"

"will you be okay with that?"

"...yeah"

I

at times like this

we are bound to call out for help

each of us are ought to have conversations with ourselves in solitude

the human way

we cope


back to being

back to the natural pulse

o how far have we come

what does it mean to take two steps back

the tools of measurement, blunted


yes, we seek to cling

metaphysically

it is only but a pro-longed extension of demise

all things come to an end

and so does a new beginning

childbirth castles in the sky

my senses have being tapped to receive

the possibilities of feeling pain

hormones, nerve endings

confusion, intensity

ants and buzzing tingles

every sign of adaptation

an act of extension —— improvised through


the birth of a soul

the embodiment of introducing life

the gift, being a giver

letting progression run within your body, a temple

the wonders of probability

of hopes and dreams

of resemblance


by nature, an unknown territory

as one squeezes air through lungs

as one tries to relax and remain control

as one being in tuned with the rhythm,
                              grounded with the earth

as one regret decisions made

as one feels ashamed, diminished, flawed

as one is filled with doubt

as each moment is observed to be present, inching

all but to bring a new born to life


juxtaposed by the fundamental reason this decision was made

of expectations and uncertainties

it is outside of a self, for such calling

if one doesn't outsmart one's self

this rule of the circle of life 

O child

love is where all it begin

as one honours her journey

of one called childbirth



my mother might be short of words and expression

no matter how much she tries

she still loves

Wales

I deem myself a super-romantic

leashed for the longest time

my heart flutters effortlessly

as sometimes, I would admire about such trait

it will take me faraway

perhaps unnecessarily having extras captured 

the amplification of an emotion echos

like a bat in the cave

in the cave

cave

I would recreate debris

from assumed remnants 

and decorate them with more layers

adorn with care

building my precious little world -

until I actually get there

kind of mental

in reality, it's physical 

when it takes place

it usually comes with a fragrance

and I am pretty sure of this calling

Wales