Scorching Sun

The sun was generous, as we tell from the emitted rays

I walked without looking too far, with my dirt covered hair

       freely, like I've owed nothing to anybody

until I see you from a distance

The sun was generous, cutting interactions short

I remembered turning back to watch you leave

I am out numbered, I noticed, I still am - after all this while

 

My vision blurred as I looked back

I don't remember your faded hair colour

but I realised I still long for your presence - even unobtainable 

I remember I feared

you have been always stronger, like masculinely strong

I don't want to be hurt again

you have every capacity of doing so

my guard was built sky high, extending in parallel, as I look back

will there be a time where I will completely forget everything?

why do I have to see you again? 

I don't know if you'd ever have good things to say about me 

I regret that it is all this fragile

I regret that my expectations were overflowing

I don't know if we'd ever stop acting that we're all fine

The sun was generous, as we tell from the emitted rays