Epileptic

This experience must be one similar

of a neurological lapse

I couldn't get you off my mind

despite draining my physique

in a pool

under the sky of no limits

any form of defined space


Its overwhelming

...something beyond control


you were nothing

just a trigger


no, you were never worth it

I was just pulling up a show, one for me and myself

so that I am (self) entertained and not bored to stone



I couldn't have you erased

now that I feel that it's a must

I have never left myself in submerged in the pool for a very long time now

I am not you, and I couldn't possibly be you

No personification

No form of mimicry, or resemblance of manifesto

Even this very word

Speaks of utter instructions, a definite expression

Resistance


I will let you go

completely

and I shall come to meet you again one day

if all permits

if there will be a better time for all


I've walked up to you once

now I shall step back and sink

and submerge

like a sunset

like how nature revolves

Over Gingham Tablecloths

Those chats I couldn't possible walk by.

They were superficial, without substance and served less of a purpose.

All that I could go forever when a cycle is to be analysed.

Is that what you call a catch - up session, to find out that you will always have to start from zero,

because of your distanced circles,

circles that overlapped only of one's past.




Dream destinations to be toured, weaved adventures, how time flies, those ever over-represented knots of life one could go forever in discussion...

Why do we submit to a pattern of how we thought life is supposed to be lived, where is your courage of redeeming your freedom that you should take charge of?

Where art thy lonely souls lingering to?



Seating on each other, as a default-dominant position in a ring of wrestle

The pre-constructed subconsciousness one oozes,

I refrained myself from reaching out

your world view haunts my execution, dreams and positive possibilities


But you are my friend,

how could I not let this pass

you are supposed to hit my core, as I how open and sincere I am,

when I come with open arms to receive you



Such was the conversations who were supposed to be lovely and enjoyed

over a Sunday afternoon

Interference

Father in purple robe

Christmas hymns

Rewarded reverb from the built of surface

interference


Morphic resonance

I saw you somewhere not far away

I thought I experienced

What it is like to have you around

Is it still in my system?

interference


Times like this I feel suffocated

My indulgence for self righteousness (as quoted)

Is when my actions could be quantified

I get obsessed with numbers

Such assurance I am satisfied with - a mere variable

interference


I remember how late I found out

My feelings for a subject

You - in this case

When it doesn't really matter

At this moment

interference


I feel like the state is eating itself

Outside in

I am eventually to be engulfed

To the non-existent

interference


Now what is my purpose

of my actions

Do they have to be justifiable -

My being in this realm

interference

Bossom

I looked left
right
and left again

Not to cross the street

But to open up my eyes and perceive
how beautiful you remain
and how beautiful you have became
how alive you've triggered me into

it felt like I'm a 2 year old

you beautiful hometown

Vessel

I said to myself

that you can never fulfill my ray of imagination

After all that happened

I was right after all



Let the world spin within your fingertips

Yes its because of your capability, your earnest link between your act that justifies

and not leaving behind the charm

those who have eyes have that absorbed

it is your weapon

attached as an extension


if that wasn't clear enough

the charm is your weapon, hidden subtly behind curtains

an extension you equipped to spin the world

I was blessed because

I was given the chance to see through that


that you couldn't fill my rays of imagination


Goodbye

Plan B: Honesty

I never wished to hide from you

Honesty is an act of beauty

if you were to hesitate going through its circumstances

I doubt that you could stand among more misfits to be encountered


Here is my honesty to you -

If it doesn't serve as a purpose

it is hence seen as unnecessary

we've agreed on that, the other night

I have been squandering too much on you

too much that it has to be voided

and avoided

your actions told me that was true

for that was my only source of cue


There are just so much to treasure among the others

and I do value the transparency I share with each individuals

if what we have defeat its purpose - be it the means, or end

there is no point my dear

no point to keep this going


I like you

and I wish to take this further

I am not hasty, I believe so

it is just my pace that is different than yours

plus the many other external factors

that we somehow couldn't intercept

or should I say at least we tried


I do not know if it is supposed to be tough

when to let go

or when to wait

you are like a wind

mysterious and uncertain

no patterns to be observed

unless one chooses to play it safe with you

without any desire to change the status quo - even the slightest of that



I like you

even when I'm trying to hide it away

to not acknowledge it

eventually I found out

it had to be released



But now

I'll have to keep it aside

in the closet for now

no one knows what will happen to it

I just figured that it couldn't be released at this point

it causes damage

I presume



So fly

love

like how I used to put it

fly and never come back

don't even try to attempt


Don't ever come back

Dear Someone

My tenderness is reserved like always, my dear.

So much as I'd want to love you,

you're telling me otherwise

maybe it is for my utmost selfish reasons

that I couldn't stop myself from doing this


I did not anticipate a storm

I hope this is not one

I shall not repeat mistakes,

my dear I shall not.


I want to say 'bear with me'

No, you have no reason to do that

You're not supposed to be a friend too close

Remember?

Because I'm not the one that you'd find yourself falling for