real life

I cry when I turn away

from greeting a shiba I met over the car window


I cry when I hear her say

she's going to hitch hike tomorrow


I cry on bed when I thought I lost somebody

soon as I wake up to that twilight breeze





Moments that I thought I could own freely

slipped through my fingers

as I owned all that I wish

ever so indirectly

flipping pages

let go of me 



soaring high is when

I express love to you

it was liberating

it was translucent

it was selfless

it was without an agenda

perhaps it will run out of fuel, one day



but in the moment

it is real

real as flesh



you have no idea

having them all blocked

my thoughts

all hidden

what I show is not what I intend to uncover

I still want to be undressed

by your fingertips

your whispers

and your warm, warm breathe




I am sorry, love

I had pushed to much

it wasn't supposed to be heavy weighted

I love you,

I do




you won it all

while I lose

初體驗

registration of an act in the mind

the matters of the most trivial

since when have I lost the ability -

no



since when have I pick up the ability

of feeling such simple feelings

you make me weak on my knees

I have zero immunity on you being you



you sent me a picture

you sent me a thought

so I can keep it in my pocket

so you can make me smile

I did it

an act that I would never fathom

even with that presence I would still hide

because your eyes speak of that one language

I'm smitten

I'm all yours



you have no idea

how dear you are to me

in the case where time and space

has to stand in between

the universe of our souls


and always

I feel like travelling ahead of time

just to touch you

just to see you

just to hear you

just to smell you

to taste you




my love

now, this space

this experience is butter

this lifetime would be our butter knife

the touch would be what I'm feeling now

smooth

and you

you are my good fat,

saturated

someday my prince will come

because of the slightest change of air

the colour of space

it became so intimate, one that I own so dearly

I have been careful of my expressions

and as I open, I listen to myself that morn

I digest your words like food particles

into my bloodstream






I guess I willingly took you into another context

one that only allows the two of us to exist







I thank you, for you came like the wind

swiped my feet and puffed the skirt I wore



as I savour my moment of being held in your arms

as I put everything I came for, in your hands

and see you fly




you reminded me of a part of me that I have never seen

and as my rhythm sways its way

you came, like a prince

with a dark coat he wears




lets walk this path

love

departure

because you can do everything you desire

and there is no way I can ever have it reproduced

in such manner


that is why you shall be forever pursued

that is why you shall be forever loved


that is why

you and I

will stand across a river

with a thin golden thread held in our hands



I am coming

closer to you

旅行这回事

花了一辈子的时间

酝酿对实现一件事的念头

现在快到位了

我却不懂在感慨什么

breaking dawn

my heart bled because

I understood that you chose to shut me out

in that world that you want to build for your own

with limited access of human contact

perhaps it's because you're grounded to your own pain

engulfed by the microorganisms you cultured

I am no where near to be seen


how I wish I could be there

silent as the air






Oh I am there

with you

so much numbness you go through

with you

voluntary